Joe's Journal

Pile it on...
Shannon jumped in the Rene'e boat today. Now she too has lost her license, and she doesn't even have a work-only one. So at the minimum, she won't be able to visit here until September. Didn't really phase me as bad as I think it should, but typically I'm not in a bad mood until nightfall.

I think all bad news should come to me during the day. Then perhaps I won't feel the urge to bitch on here as bad. Heh.

Current Mood: confused

From 2 days off to 0
I'm going to make this quick, since if I allow myself to ramble on about how I feel I'll end up sounding even more bitter than I am right now. Originally I was to take wednesday and thursday off to get my car fixed up, and thursday to go see rene'e. wednesday is now out because I'm needed because of payroll and the boss's sister has difficulty finding a computer's on button, much less running the payroll calculator program. Since my dad doesn't really "need" the car for work, I'm going in tomorrow. And thursday is now totally out because I heard from Greg that Rene'e doesn't want to take the risk to drive down here and have another cop pull her over for a "broken taillight" or something stupid and then say "oh look! you can't drive!" like last time. I can't blame her though. Getting another ticket now with her being on a work-only license and having to be in court in may would kill things even more.

I couldn't drown my annoyance in buying things and ebaying because there's a shortage of unlimited, since people on the boards were like "oh! i do not need unlimited, i will just buy a starter!" and I assume wizkids freaked and cut the production run to an almost minimal amount. And when unlimited hit...it sells out within days at my local store. He can't find more, and there's a booster tournament this weekend. Perfect.

I suppose the only upsides to today was an interesting lunch-drive with Kim and a possible new phone system at work. New system means I won't go out of my mind with boredom for a little while longer.

Current Mood: annoyed
Current Music: Serial Experiments Lain - Duvet (Opening, Full)

Typically I write when things go really wrong, or just not at all. If I've had a good day, I'm usually getting home to late to write, and then I forget. But when something wrong happens, and I'm home... have to get it out somewhere.

I might as well explain what happened since last week and catch up with things. The call back from the interview never came. I got like 4 rejections letters over the past few days. Friday's tournament went okay, came in second place going 3-0. Pat was in such a terrible mood that he threw his last game. The whole job search is getting me down, especially after this last mess.

Sunday was D&D night. I was expecting a terrible mood from pat, and after his outburst during a chat between he, kim, and i, they deemed me the "pat barometer" and to call them to call the game off he was still terrible. When I picked him up, everything was fine. The game was fine...until the star wars trailer. Then all the couples just cuddled up and interest in the game was pretty much over for the night. I was just tired and wanted to leave, so I came up with an excuse about having to be into work early the next day and left. I took a walk around suburbia for a while before heading home. It's really nice to be able to wander around without being afraid of some guy named tyrone and his gang the icy black hand of death ( yes, yes, calvin and hobbes ) wanting to kill me.
So after all this, I thought thursday would be salvation. Finally, a Rene'e day - and she even called me to set it up.

And now today. Every time I think I'm finally due for karma to roll back in the right direction - every time i have some day set up with shannon or rene'e...it blows up. Rene'e got fired today. She just spent most of her savings on a really fancy new camera ... to use when she came down here to visit. With no license, very little money, and now no job, she's not coming thursday. She said with everything going wrong in her life one by one ( just lost boyfriend, roommate replaced her at work ) she might just say fuck it and come down anyway. Something needs to go right eventually.

Yeah. I agree, something needs to go right... eventually.

Current Mood: pissed off

Job Thoughts
Well, after rethinking the whole job thing over the past few days, I think I screwed up a few things that pretty much did me in.

1) I should have brought my VB program from work
2) I should have wrote a "thank you" letter post-interview
3) I think I should have had a drink before going there

I'm assuming the memory questions were just the guy being a rat. Live and learn I suppose.

Current Mood: tired

Ebay Ahoy!
I went back to my comic store that sells MK unlimited today to pick up a few more packs after my incredible luck on my original batch. This time my luck wasn't as insane, going from a 1 in 3 pack unique draw to a 1 in 6. I took 6 of the 7 uniques I landed and threw em up on ebay. Within one night, all but 2 sold immediately with a swarm of other bidders asking if I had more to sell. Originally spending a total of $136.25, 6 uniques land me $120 ( keeping the 7th for painting and/or pat ). If I fudge the shipping rates by charging to the company, that's an additional $24, bringing the total to $144. After Ebay and Paypal take their respective 5.25 and 4.4 hunks of flesh out of me ( average $12 ) I actually just about break even. With the uniques sold, I have some 28 packs sans uniques that are free and clear.

Which brings up the further question whether to press my luck or not and buy more tomorrow. If I can get a distribution of 1 in 4 or better, I do well. If I fare like today, I lose a few bucks. Of course, if the market on these new figures crashing on me in the next few days, I lose big.

Damn, I love ebay. I've been away from it for too long. I'm enjoying selling the pieces more than playing with them.

Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: Serial Experiments Lain - Duvet (Opening, Full)

I was supposed to receive the call regarding the interview today. It didn't come.

I feel pretty much terrible. Not totally because I didn't get the job, because I'm stuck at creative nightmare. Deb's quitting mid-april. The very last person left from the beginning.
Most of my workdays are spent now taking long lunches and trying desperately to keep busy in between my boss hovering over me.

I really have got to find a way out of here.

Current Mood: depressed
Current Music: Mallrats

It's been a rather interesting day. I didn't write about my interview in the past few days because I thought writing about it would get my hopes up. Now that it's over, I can say that I think it went well save for the memory questions the guy hit me with at the end of the interview ("name the five types of companies we deal with"). That little mess broke my spirit, but after calling Kim and talking with her, she made me feel better about the thing. Kim's usually helpful when I'm feeling down, usually counteracts whatever mood i'm in my being dorky or supportive. I really appreciate her.

After talking with Kim, I called Rene'e. I needed to cheer up a bit, and it was Thursday, so it was a perfect time to call. I called her up and she was really happy to hear my voice after the past month of my phone being screwed up. Not even after talking to her for a minute, she's like "yeah, i'm at a red light...oh no, there's a cop behind me...please don't check my plates........oh shit. joe, i gotta go, talk to you later."

So now I'm worried about Rene'e AND the interview. But more about her...there's other jobs out there, but rene'e... I'm going to call her tomorrow before the wake from hell. The next two days are going to suck real hard.

Current Mood: worried
Current Music: Watching Serial Experiments Lain

I haven't written in a few days, and a lot has happened.

Friday was Shannon day, and it went great. She actually read the label on the quacky duck i gave her aloud ( squeeze my tummy ) and she really got it for being that dense to do that in front of me. We basically just went to woodfield mall, and she blew almost $100 on games, food, and an ice cream cake. At least she really has no good reason to complain about being in debt, it's kind of obvious why. It was still a really great day.

Saturday was the City of Bydalia tournament, and I went with Pat and Erik. Basically, it looked like the friday regulars were on one team ( Arcane Drunk-onum. Har har ) and the out-of-staters were on the other ( Rayden Marz ) Rather than going through a play by play, it really did look like the friday regulars had no idea what they were going up against. A huge portion of the Rayden team was made up of the current archetype neo-yoyo ram or whatever it's called, whereas the friday people had a random spattering of this-and-that armies. First round went well as was said before, but it just crashed and burned for the "Drunk-onums" from there on out.

Still, I have to admit, it was a great tourney. Nobody really "lost" because both sides got uniques in the end, and a whole bunch of other more common pieces. I think Kitty got a special glee early on in the final passing out of pieces when she said "And the arcane drunk-onums get uni....corns." What a collective groan that was. :) Best of all, I got myself a Dwarven War Wagon for being the best sportsman. Yes, dorkiness does have its moments.

Also, I received a call today regarding yet another job opening. It's nice to see that some of my work is paying off after all these months, and hopefully one of these calls will pan out into a real job. I would so like to get moving with life and out of my little ghetto I call home.

On a sadder note, my grandmother will most likely pass away within a week. She's pretty much in a coma now and the doctors don't give her long. I don't feel a lot of sadness, though. I didn't know her very well for most of my life, she got Alzheimer's when I was still young. It's amazing she's made it so long. The earliest memory I have of her is of her referring to me as "boy", so it's really not a surprise that I don't feel too much. It may seem a bit cold, but it's true. How can one feel a sense of loss for someone you never knew? Simply being family does not mean a thing, it is the personal relationship that binds, not simple blood bond.

Current Mood: good

Finally I have a chance to write. I think my plague that I caught last week was passed on to my boss, because for someone who's always here rain, shine, or plague, he's not here and nobody knows why. So I'm pretty happy that my plague came in useful in one way. Lately I've been getting angrier with my job. My boss has been systematically eliminating all my perks here. First he got rid of all my programming tasks and threw them on the side "indefinitely", then he took away my flexibility of hours, then my ability to take days off without 200 years notice. Now he's thrown the cap of "Data Entry" on me and took away my instant messenger. Admittedly, I don't really NEED the instant messenger, it's just that he's been taking away everything that made me somewhat comfortable here that I had before Rick left.

This weekend went alright. Friday I went to a tournament and lost miserably, but got to buy Erik a birthday drink because he turned 21. The bartender was also a nice sight, running around in really short shorts and being generally dorky to us. I went to another tournament on Sunday, and by some strange fluke I actually pulled 3rd place. Beat Pat, got pounded by some frequent friday kid, got a bye, and then beat Erik.

The D&D game afterwards didn't go as well. The rules lawyers fought tooth and nail over everything, and by the end of things Kim and Erik were trying their damnedest to break out of the "set path" of the adventure. Last time we did that way back in the days of playing online, Pat had a bunch of ancient dragons come out of nowhere and eat us.
What was particularly annoying was that despite not hopping in on the "break the storyline" bandwagon, I was the only one who got Pat's flame email regarding what we ( I ) did wrong for the game. I really wasn't all that surprised. Blowing up at Erik might make Erik stop coming, blowing up at Kim...not possible. But me? Always a good target. No matter how often we fight, it always fixes up, so hey, no harm done if I get nailed.

*sigh* I'm really just annoyed at work. I want to cut my hours back, I'm hating it here more and more by the day. I really hope I get a call about that on-site tech position, because I'm not sure I really care about the details now, I just want out.

Current Mood: relaxed
Current Music: Ringing Phones

Every year...
I have a rather curious theory with regard to breakups while consoling me boyo Flurf last night. It seems strange that every valentine's ever I'm up late consoling someone's latest breakup. I will simply cut and paste my portion, I'm curious as to thoughts on this train of thought :

( cut ) still, once a girl lets go, she lets go emotionally and all. there's no going back, flurf. best thing to do, and pardon my deviating from the norm, is to just really wallow in it. don't try to stop yourself from thinking about her, it won't help and i know you can't stop yourself right now anyway. think about her, listen to your song over and over again, don't let it go. accept fate and be free.

Perhaps I'm right, maybe I'm wrong. Leave a comment and let me know your opinion.

Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: Lisa Loeb - How (Dawson's Creek)

The past few days have been a bit trying. On Monday, half way through my workday, I got this nagging hacking cough. Then I got a bad headache, and then the shivers started. I thought Mark had the AC cranked up, so I went out driving for a bit with the heat maxed. Even then, the shivers continued. I finally got back to work and left for the day. Once I got home, it got even worse even with meds. So for the first time in who knows how long, I called in sick for the next day. And after that, I called in again for the next day.

I finally went back today. Besides a terrible sounding voice, I'm pretty much over the plague. Still, I had to cancel going up to Green Bay today to hang out with Rene'e. As I'm typing this, I'm watching VHD : Bloodlust, the movie I went to see with her when it first came out. Brings back memories of that great weekend with her. And now I can see the first 10 minutes that I missed because we had to park 5 blocks away...

Yes, it's Valentine's Day, and I'm home alone watching a movie, but I don't feel bitter. It's a nice change.

Current Mood: good
Current Music: VHD : Bloodlust ( movie )

The Chicken that would not stop
Originally I planned on writing at work yesterday about everything that's happened since I last wrote, and I actually started too, but Chicken had a crisis and my mind wandered off of the journal.

Chicken is essentially doing the same thing I did with Shannon a while back, but far, far worse. The girl already has a boyfriend, and yet he's hounding after her. He's doing everything in his power to break them up, and is getting more obvious the more impatient he gets. He almost sent her a letter saying how bad her current boyfriend was and how good he would be, but i somehow convinced him not to. He thanks me, and then proceeds one hour later to blow up and her and essentially tell her the contents of the letter. And this weekend he comes back home purely out of spite because she chose to see her boyfriend instead of him. Finally, he wants to hang out with me to pass the time before he goes back early.

I didn't know what to say. To be used as a way to "pass the time" before he goes back up and drives some girl with a bad tendency to flirt ( or chicken's simple desperation )
insane while he hounds after her to drop her boy... I threw an excuse at him and decided to just stick around here today. I was just so appalled at his methods that I really don't think i would have enjoyed hanging around with him today without feeling some sort of bitterness towards him.

No, now that I think about it, my situation with Shannon is nothing like his. If anything, it was more like that stint way back when I was going after Kim.

Bah, I'm at a loss for words. I will try to write more later after dinner, my dad has decided to go get long john silver's for dinner. yay.

Current Mood: distressed

Going to Cary's today didn't work out. He was planning on going to World of Wheels last night, but it fell through so he went this morning, saying he'd be back by 3, 4 at the latest. Now I realized that his dad would have me eating everything in the house when I got there, so I skipped lunch in preparation. Three rolls around, no Cary. Four, still nothing. By this point I'm starving, so I eat. And as I finish up around five, he calls. I decide to let the day go and reschedule for Wednesday.

Not much else for me today. Feeling a little burned out. Yesterday's mood was simply a late night thing, I think. Another boring week at work ahead, weee.

Current Mood: okay
Current Music: Watching TV - The Practice

The past few days have been rather drear. I finally got the digital camera from work and went to the park to get a few pictures, but the sun was almost totally set so I only got one that I consider worthwhile. I hung out at the bookstore for a while, but nothing really came of it. When I was there just reading for the sake of it, girls came and went without my notice. And now that I'm there for the hope to find another, nothing happens. As much as I dislike it, it seems rather ironic...and just.

Today was a mostly wasted day, went to Best Buy to get my dad a DVD player for his birthday and now my mom is inquiring about one. Other than that, I watched Candyman, a movie that I never understood as a kid but find it rather interesting now, and banged away at Anarchy Online. Silly game.

As for tomorrow, Erik canceled for the game. I suppose I'll end up going to Cary's house and "eata eata" while formatting his computer. After that, I really don't know. Since Erik canceled, I won't be going to Pat's that night. I'll probably end up there monday night trying to prepare for a tournament that he really doesn't care for. His not caring and my lack of the new game breaker pieces is wearing at me, and I don't think I'll be going for more than a day if nothing changes.

For now I'll attribute my poor mood to being tired, and go to sleep. We'll see if it's tiredness or a real thing.

Current Mood: depressed
Current Music: Billy Joel - Piano Man

Today's been rather dismal so far. Came out of the house this morning to a car buried in snow. Rammed my way out of my ice coffin to find out that my wipers were shot. Drove to work through the mess on my windshield with the occasional truck kicking up a cubic ton of snow onto it further adding to my misery. Only after getting to work and screwing with the fuses for a while did I get the wipers back up and working.

The girls were babbling in the phone room as usual, referring to michelle as my girlfriend and whatnot. Peggle goes and blurts out "oh my god joe doesn't need a girlfriend he's married to his computer".

Yeah, thanks Peg. Time for a break.

I'm feeling terrible right now with this sickness and headache, but I think I should update before I get lazy and forget tomorrow. Yesterday I went to the friday game night at Pasttimes with Pat. It wasn't a bad experience, for the most part most of the gamers are alright, although there are some that are lunatic fringe. I didn't especially appreciate the guy who was bellowing for the better part of the night how he "cheated me" out of one of my figures. Still, it wasn't that bad an outing and hopefully when Sparky runs some better games I'll go again. Pat was just simply bored off his ass, I don't know if he'll be going again.

Most of today I wasted playing Anarchy Online, a MMRPG that Pat addicted me too recently. As much as I realize that the entire basis of the game right now is getting missions, running really far to the mission point, killing a bunch of things, and repeating this whole process - it's pretty cool. Maybe it's just nostalgia for way back when I used to play Daggerfall.

Rene'e called me a few hours ago. Like she said in the letter, she's getting out of debt and just got her phone back. She told me once she gets her car insurance back, she'll come down to visit. She anticipates it'll be in March, which is still a ways off. She wants to come down when the boats are sailing again anyway. :)

Finally, I'd like to just mention that a girl messaged me on AOL with regard to how she appreciated my writing style on the journal. I really do like hearing from people on the journal besides Kim and Pat, and I'm hoping to get more feedback in the future.

I really hope I feel better tomorrow, or I'm going to be missing the Sunday game again. I'd really like to play one of these days.

Current Mood: sick
Current Music: Sting - Fields of Gold

Rene'e Returns
I got home from a good night with Pat to a letter from the Rene'e. She figured out that her boyfriend was riding his injury for all it was worth and ditched him. She found some new guy that actually takes her out on dates and stuff ( wee ). And plus, the Liz is going to move in with her as a roomie to replace the ex.

She also said as soon as her debts as paid, she's coming back to Chicago. She wants to go ride the train. :)

It's good that Rene'e is moving on and making better decisions with her life. Maybe I can see her again in the spring. And best of all, I'm glad that I haven't lost her.

Current Mood: happy

Interesting, one of our salespeople at the office is selling 366 Mhz laptops for $150. Told him I'm in, I'll have to see how it turns out in a week or so.

On another note, I told Kraggy today that I'm out of the playtest group. All I need to do is make use of my now open Wednesday nights, but I need a reason besides just to go to the bookstore and hang out. Hopefully my craving for asiago cheese bagels at Panera will get me going to the bookstore on a regular basis. :)

I called back Crymerica (sp?) today regarding the position they called me about. Turns out that they're the marketing division of Citigroup and they needed a trainer. They ran over their whole spiel with me, mostly being that I'd be going out to different branches doing training. The guy on the phone asked me where I want to be taking my career right now, and I said that I'd like to go into networking or programming. He sounded confused for a second, and mentioned that that the girl who initally called me said I had teaching experience. I said yeah, I taught programming for a few years. I asked if the position would have anything computer related in it, and he said no, not really. And so I turned it down.

I wasn't sure about my decision, so I ran it by Pat and Kim. They both said "At least you'd make more" and "it's better than data entry". I do data entry for one day because we're short three phone girls and that becomes my new title.

I stand behind my decision. I refuse to go into a position that has nothing to do with my field simply because I'll make more.

Current Mood: accomplished

Rather quickly, I will go over the two ill-fated tournaments I went to this weekend. Day one was pretty fun, although my only wins were because of a bye and the other because of the rather stupid tiebreaker rule "the unit that costs less wins". Still, I enjoyed myself for the most part and got some trades done.

Today was worse, most of the people there were the hardcore types. Again, my first hero was the worst out of the 8, and the other was the hero our old playtest group named "Brokensword" ( rather fittingly ). Again, one win was a bye. The other, because the "unit costs less" rule couldn't apply since Broken and the other guy cost the same came down to a bloody dice roll. I won it, but it didn't affect the outcome. I came in 6th out of 7. I am really beginning to loathe sealed.

Michelle had her baby over the weekend. The last bit of sanity at work is now gone. Mark emailed me and said I'm probably going to end up doing some data entry for a while.

At least I got a call about a job over the weekend - and it's not from a staffing firm. Weeeee.

Current Mood: irritated

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